He paused for a moment, counting down the minutes until the new year. “Only in my time zone, though,” he thought. Yet before he could travel farther into the distraction of universal time, he pulled himself back into his original, distracting thought. “What should I resolve to be for next year?” A beautiful question, dripping with cliché. “Resolutions always fail, so maybe I should resolve to be poor and fat? Wait, that’s stupid, what if this is the year they come true? Hey...no! Resolutions don’t come true, they are...um...what are they again? Eh, I resolve not to follow my resolution.”
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