Friday, December 31, 2010

The Distance


Excitedly crouched at the starting line, he waited for his moment to sprint. As the runners exhausted their energy by the final lap, he knew that he could outmotor any of the enfeebled competition. It was a risky move, but he felt it was time to show the world what he was capable of. He burst through the lanes, closing in on the frontrunners. He felt so free in the open breeze. The looks of shock and anger were priceless, and as he passed the runner in first, he knew the charges for public indecency would be worth it. Maybe.

3 comments:

  1. Those charges are always worth it. Always.

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  2. Constructive critism, if it is welcome... The second sentence doesn't flow. Maybe... "their energy coming into the final lap" ... or, for word-count purposes, maybe switch the end of the sentence for the beginning...
    Regardless, the story gave me a giggle and a perfectly disturbing mental picture :)

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  3. Hmm, I see what you mean. To be honest, I don't spend as much time as I should editing the content as I do the word count. Hopefully things will improve with time.

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